What's the difference between

defiance and a sincere question?

The last thought is a seeming paradox. Focus and relax. Focus on the ones that are the most important to you and relax about keeping up with the world's expectations. With our priorities in order, we can set our own expectations and let the world conform to our lives.

Here is an excerpt 

INTRODUCTION

The Internet is no longer a novelty. It is an established presence in many, many people’s lives. Having grown from a computer-based ‘fad’ to an integral part of mobile phone technology, the Internet has become a must-have item for not only business people and students, but just plain folks.

Unfortunately, the Internet, available to virtually anyone, is also home to a whole new type of predator. No one is exempt from problems that 

could arise from this type of predator. Identity theft, cyberstalking, cyberbullying, all terms relatively new to users of the World Wide Web, have 

become items of global concern. Because of these concerns, yet another term has been coined, cyber security.  People need to learn how to keep 

themselves and their children safe online.

The article below is titled "How to Bully Proof Your Kid."  Kidsafe.com has free reports to help you. 

 

Tune in all this week for a special series devoted to bullying and its damaging effects on our children, on "AC360º" at 8 p.m. ET. Then tune in Saturday night at 8 ET for "Bullying: It Stops Here," a special town hall discussion led by Anderson Cooper.

(CNN) — Miranda Jones can remember many afternoons in the counselor's office in her small-town Colorado middle school, crying about other kids relentlessly teasing about her weight.

She'd change clothes in the bathroom stall after gym so the other girls wouldn't laugh at her size. By high school, she was spending countless hours in the library reading to avoid social situations and the possibility of being teased. She rarely complained to her teachers, assuming they would just make it worse if they confronted her bullies.

"I went out on a limb (my freshman year in high school) and decided to join the speech and debate team, which filled countless hours of time that I would have otherwise spent being sad about my lack of friends," says Jones (who didn't want to reveal her real name because she's embarrassed by what happened to her). "Thanks to that activity, I actually made some wonderful friends. I had something to do every weekend. And I was good at it. That was the biggest thing, I think. I excelled at something that terrified most other people my age, and in that, I had some power."

Now at a top-ranked women's college in the Northeast, Jones is grateful her debate coaches helped her find something she loved that kept her focused and got her into college. "Without an after-school activity, academic support from adults and without constantly reminding myself that it wasn't going to last forever, I never would have survived the endless taunts of my peers."

Battling back against bullying Teen bullying interveners The roots of bullying Getting to the root of bullying

It's unfortunate that our children will get bullied at school, whether it's about their appearance or dress, their academic ability or hobbies, a disability or just the fact that they're the new kids in town.

Schools with vigorous anti-bullying programming are more likely to stop bullies in their tracks, but not every school has a commitment to stopping the abuse. However, there are things parents can do to strengthen their children before the bullying starts, convince them to tell parents if a verbal or physical attack occurs, and keep them safe.

Start early. Does your child understand the difference between thinking, feeling and action?

Starting when their son was 3, psychologist Tammy Hughes and her school psychologist husband started teaching him. At night, they'd say, "Tell me three good things that happened to you today." This helped him make the distinction between events and his feelings about them.

Once he had that mastered, they added, "Tell me three good things that happened to someone else (lesson: the world includes me and other people, their feelings and actions)."

Next they asked, "Tell me something you did that worked out well. Now, tell me something that someone else did that worked out well for someone else."

"These simple questions help children differentiate themselves and others, and (teach them) cause and effect. If you can connect these ideas and feelings, then it helps children to prepare to identify bullying — negative versus positive behaviors — and who did what to cause the outcome," says Hughes, chair of Duquesne University's department of counseling, psychology and special education and co-author of "Understanding Girl Bullying and What to Do About It: Strategies to Help Heal the Divide." "These simple steps help children to guard against blaming themselves for the bullying of others and to help them feel they can act to change the situation."
When their son turned 6 and was introduced to his school's formal bully prevention curriculum, he already knew how to talk about feelings and their source and how to act according to the school's instructions about bullying.

"Parents and teachers will find that it is not how savvy they are in their conversations with their child, but rather how often they engage the child in preparing for thinking, feeling and action when the parent is not around," says Hughes.

Develop a sense of self. A sense of self isn't about children feeling good all the time or getting a trophy for showing up to every soccer game. It's teaching a child to have core sense of sturdiness so her sense of who she is isn't defined by the whim of her peers.

Parents show their children they know them when they choose an activity with them, discuss personal problems, and talk about their day. It's also reflected when a parent makes a comment about something unique or challenging for a particular child.

"It's about parents really being tuned into their children and the kind of people they are," says Richard Weissbourd, a lecturer at the Harvard Graduate School of Education and author of "The Parents We Mean to Be." "We want to reflect back to them who they are, whether they are spirited, soulful, feisty, funny or strong-willed. It's not explicitly praising them a lot that matters. It's demonstrating a deep knowledge of and affirming who they are."

Encourage courageous behavior. Bullying flourishes in school communities when most of the community stays silent while the bullies attack.

Bullies have power when the audience of bystanders is silent. Bystanders should speak out to the bully and or officials.

"When one kid gets bullied, everyone is silent or laughs or goes along with it because they don't want it to turn on them," says Kenneth Ginsburg, a pediatrician at the Children's Hospital of Philadelphia and co-author of "Letting Go with Love and Confidence: Raising Responsible, Resilient, Self-Sufficient Teens in the 21st Century." "They sacrifice someone to keep themselves safe."

Teachers and coaches can encourage students to speak up when someone is attacked. Any student can encourage members of their team or club to do the right thing, but those lessons often start at home.

Raise your child with character and values, sharing stories of people (including you) who have done the right thing in the face of adversity. That way they can stand up against bullying or other injustice when it occurs at school. "Character is about doing the right thing when nobody is watching or when it's hard to do," says Ginsburg. "The person with character says, 'not in my presence.'"
Look in the mirror. Become aware of your own behavior, because your children will copy you.

Parents who are reasonable, calm and practice problem-solving in the face of stress and uncertainty model those skills and attitudes for their children. Once they see it works, children can develop that peaceful approach to their world and the bullies within it.

"Parents whose default response is one of intimidation may inadvertently model bullying behavior for their children," says Donna Henderson, a professor of counseling at Wake Forest University. "Or, if parents are the targets of bullying behavior from other adults and they don't address it directly, kids will assume that's the way to respond to bullies."

Develop overlapping circles. Encourage your children to become involved in after-school activities and clubs that they enjoy.

That will help them make friends with different groups of children. If one group turns on your child, he will have other friends to support him and remind him he's not alone.

"This is great for building self-esteem and gaining a greater sense of purpose," says Virginia Wilkins, director of mentoring for College For Every Student, a nonprofit that helps underserved youth prepare for college and supports them once they're there. "Say my child is being bullied in an art group. Having other social groups lets my child experience something very different. It's not all or nothing."
Develop physical confidence. Some children benefit from developing a sense of their own physical strength, whether in martial arts or another discipline.

Being able to understand the physical movement of one's body is key to establishing a child's place in the world, says triple black belt holder Kris Wilder, a Franciscan monk and co-author of "How to Win a Fight." "The success of martial arts is that it creates an immediate and indelible link to the internal sense of a child's being via external drills and discipline," says Wilder, owner of West Seattle Karate Academy.

"This makes a child more confident, (which) carries over into how a kid holds himself in the world. Bullies are predators by nature and prefer the weak as prey. A confident child is less likely to be a victim, and martial arts provides this platform for creating a resilient, confident child."

When it's not what it seems. A Los Angeles couple brought their daughter to child psychologist Wendy Mogel because she was getting bullied in school. It turned out the girl was provoking other kids to bully her because she was jealous of the amount of attention her parents gave her little brother.

"She found she could get a tremendous amount of attention with a daily download of bullying and less attention would be paid to her adorable little brother," says Mogel, author of "The Blessing of a B Minus: Using Jewish Teachings to Raise Resilient Teenagers" and other books. "When they stopped rewarding her, it stopped. I advised them to catch her being strong and pay attention to that behavior."

from: Kid Safe

Digital Defense is partnering with the Alamo ISSA (Information Systems Security Association) during National Cyber Security Awareness month to provide community education forums at no cost to the public.

San Antonio, TX (PRWEB) October 12, 2011

Digital Defense, Inc. (DDI), a San Antonio-based corporation and leading provider of Information Security solutions, is partnering with the Alamo ISSA (Information Systems Security Association) during National Cyber Security Awareness month to provide community education forums at no cost to the public. DDI will host two of these informational sessions:

Protecting Yourself Online – Wednesday, October 19th, 5:30 – 6:30 p.m.

This session is designed to highlight risks associated with online computer use with real world examples and recommendations for testing and resolving computer security issues.

Child Safe – Thursday, October 20th, 5:30 – 6:30 p.m.

A program designed to educate and provide a place that parents can come to learn about protecting themselves and their families from online threats, both as they exist today and where they are going tomorrow.

“With the arrival of National Cyber Security Awareness Month, we thought it would be a great idea to launch educational programs related to computer security at no charge to help educate citizens on how to better protect themselves online,” stated Matt Hajda, president of Alamo ISSA. “These sessions, along with the mentoring of students for the CyberPatriot Competition, all align with our overarching mission to educate and expand the knowledge and skills of ISSA members in information security. We appreciate DDI’s participation in helping to bring further awareness to the importance of information security education.”

Digital Defense CEO and President, Larry Hurtado added, “We are pleased to be a play a role in heightening awareness around cyber security. The October forums align with San Antonio Mayor Julian Castro’s recent proclamation which recognizes National Cyber Security Awareness month and encourages government, research, and business organizations to engage in activities to educate citizens of the importance of implementing proper computer and network security procedures and online safety practices.”

To learn more about the cyber security awareness events, visit the Alamo ISSA website.

About Alamo ISSA Chapter

The Alamo ISSA Chapter of ISSA was founded in 2000 and meets monthly in San Antonio, providing members with education and networking opportunities. Meetings are open to the public, and schedules are available at http://alamo.issa.org.

About ISSA

ISSA, http://www.issa.org, is the largest international professional association for information security professionals. With 10,000 members in 70 countries and a network of 152 chapters, ISSA is dedicated to expanding the knowledge and expertise of information security professionals and the development and evolution of industry practices. Members are consistently recognized as experts on critical issues in the field and are seen as important resources for small businesses, global enterprises, and government organizations.

About Digital Defense

Digital Defense, Inc. (DDI) is a leading provider of security governance, risk management, and compliance (GRC) solutions. Our unique combination of managed, cloud-based services, gives our clients maximum flexibility in the implementation of their security programs. We provide the insight necessary for organizations to protect their critical customer and business information while allowing them to focus on their business, rather than dedicate resources to network security. DDI clients enjoy greater visibility and management insight of their enterprise-wide GRC programs using DDI’s proprietary Software as a Service (SaaS) delivery platforms and assessment tools. For more information about Digital Defense, please visit our web site at http://www.ddifrontline.com or contact us at 888.273.1412.

Reader Contact Information

Digital Defense, Inc., 9000 Tesoro Drive, Suite 100, San Antonio, Texas, 78217

Phone – 210.822.2645, Fax – 210.822.9216

http://www.ddifrontline.com

###

Digital Defense and the Shield Logo are Registered Service Marks of Digital Defense, Inc. All other trademarks are the property of their respective owners.

Patty Koebele
Digital Defense, Inc.
210.582.6128
Email Information

Police said Bill Stanton, who declined to say who hired him, won't have access to any case files related to their search for Lisa Irwin because he isn't law enforcement. He also doesn't appear to be licensed as a private investigator in Missouri as required when acting in that capacity.

"He will have access to anything the general public has access to," Kansas City police spokesman Capt. Steve Young said.

When asked by the Associated Press if he has handled a missing child case, Stanton said he couldn't detail cases involving children, then responded "Google me" when asked to discuss any of his past cases. He said he has worked as a consultant for "major media organizations," and the website for a consulting firm that lists him as a founding partner said he was a New York police officer before moving into private investigative work.

Lisa's parents, Deborah Bradley and Jeremy Irwin, reported their daughter missing early Oct. 4, saying she disappeared from her crib at their single-story home sometime overnight as her mother slept in a nearby room.

Hundreds of local, state and federal investigators have been looking for the child ever since, scouring through hundreds of tips and repeatedly searching the family's neighborhood, nearby woods, sewers and a landfill. But police said they have no suspects or solid leads.

Stanton said a wealthy "benefactor" connected to a family member asked him to get involved and acknowledged the family didn't hire him. Stanton said he would fly in other people on Thursday, but wouldn't elaborate.

"I am hopeful this child is safe and alive," Stanton said. "I don't want to make this about me."He said he would be managing any media inquiries directed at the family, which family members confirmed. They said he had their support.

On Wednesday, detectives using all-terrain vehicles and tracking dogs searched a heavily wooded area a few blocks from the home, but it turned up nothing. Young said more than 40 detectives, along with the FBI and other police departments, are working the case.

What Stanton could offer the investigation is unclear.  Ernie Allen, president of the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children, said his organization doesn't work with private investigators and had not heard of Stanton.

"Families in these situations are desperate and feel the need to do anything they can possibly do," Allen said. "I hope he helps them."

Jimmie Mesis, editor-in-chief of New Jersey-based PI Magazine, a trade magazine for private investigators, said he has heard of Stanton. He said Stanton's involvement could be troublesome if he interferes with witnesses, but he also could keep a national spotlight on the case — even if that attention is focused on "Wild Bill," a moniker for which Stanton has become popular.

"With Bill, one benefit, because he has celebrity status as a private investigator, the media is going to be interested in seeing what he's doing," Mesis said. Later, he added, "He's putting his reputation on the line, too."

from: Kid Safe

I have found that even I, Kid Safe blogger, have become a little jaded to all the daily reports of missing children, then the next day they are found safe and sound by someone within the family usually taken by another family member and just a "lack of communication" or worse news that for some reason i choose not to add to this site. 

Today, this was a revelation for me.  If I am "just a blogger" and have this attitude, what must the police think when they get these calls?  The investigators that deal with this on a daily basis.  I know for me the whole Casey Anthony tragedy really upset me in a different way than the Amber Dubois case effected me.  You see I lived in Escondido when Amber Dubois went missing and I was working at Kid Safe and was HORRIFIED that they would not issue an "Amber Alert", they did not take the case seriously "for reasons unknown to the public".  I was deeply entrenched in the case, it was personal for me.  I lived and worked in the community and I take my position at CEN very seriously.  I felt that if "we" couldn't even get an Amber Alert issued in our own home town how could we proclaim to be the national source for Child Safety?  

I wrote more posts on the her case than any other case in the last 5 years.  I was asked to remove several of my posts, as they were derogatory towards the Escondido Police Department and it was creating a "negative" affect on the case.  So i acquiesced, against my personal feelings and judgement, "for the better good" of the company.  And NO the requests to take the posts down did not come from within CEN and CEN management left the decision up to me.   i just wanted her found.  I wanted her case taken seriously, I wanted her parents to have some peace, I was angry for them and obviously I took it all very personally.  

So when I read this report today, I remembered reading about it last week when I had chosen NOT to post it because I "assumed" the child would be found the next day and by the time the KidSafe readers got around to reading it, it would be old news or worse, I would have a stronger "story" to write about.

Then I got to the last paragraph of this report and really started to question myself, my commitment to keeping children safe, what constitutes a "story" with me, the "Content Manager" of KidSafe.com. 

Below is an excerpt from the AP "story" released today which I have scheduled to post before this one that I am writing now.  I decided to separate the posts because I don't want my personal story to effect the readers mind of the missing child report.  All Missing Child Reports MUST be taken seriously, Must be judged as TRUE "Kidnapping's" until found otherwise, by the police, the governments, the schools, the extended family, the friends AND the media, including "bloggers" like myself who proclaim to be concerned with the safety of Children.  

KANSAS CITY, Mo. — A New York-based security consultant who said he was hired by a wealthy benefactor to help search for a missing baby in Kansas City got little response Wednesday from police who have been looking for the child for more than a week……….

…………."With Bill, one benefit, because he has celebrity status as a private investigator, the media is going to be interested in seeing what he's doing," Mesis said. Later, he added, "He's putting his reputation on the line, too."

A year after the Amber Dubois Kidnapping, she was found, sadly, not alive, and not a story I like to talk about very much. 

from: Kid Safe

2,500 people attend Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention's national conference

WASHINGTON, Oct. 12, 2011 /PRNewswire-USNewswire/ — More than 2,500 people will gather this week to discuss juvenile justice, delinquency prevention, and victimization at the Department of Justice's Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention (OJJDP) conference, Children's Justice and Safety: Unite, Build, Lead, fromOctober 12-14, 2011, in National Harbor, Md.  

"This conference provides a snapshot of juvenile justice today," said Jeff Slowikowski, OJJDP Acting Administrator.  "During the next three days, we will present the latest research and evaluation findings, examine dominant and emerging issues in children's justice and safety, and develop a vision to meet the challenges that lie ahead."

The conference theme "Unite, Build, Lead" corresponds with the three days of the conference.  Day 1: Unite, focuses on bringing together the many fields of interest in juvenile justice, Day 2: Build, focuses on structuring effective programs for children and youth, and Day 3: Lead, features federal leaders addressing the future of juvenile justice. The conference's workshops will address an array of timely issues, including:

Anti-gang strategies Children's exposure to violence Disproportionate minority contact Emergency planning for juvenile facilities Girls on the margin Family and youth engagement Law enforcement partnerships	Mentoring Protecting and advocating for children Putting research into practice Substance abuse Tribal youth issues Truancy and dropping out Youth in custody

Dr. Jill Biden, wife of Vice President Joe Biden, Attorney General Eric Holder, and General Raymond T. Odierno, Chief of Staff for the U.S. Army, will deliver remarks about the importance of mentoring the children of military families on Friday, October 14.  Other participating Justice Department officials include Deputy Attorney GeneralJames Cole, Associate Attorney General Thomas Perrelli, and Assistant Attorney General Laurie O. Robinson.

Conference speakers include: R. Gil Kerlikowske, Director of the Office of National Drug Control Policy; Congressmen Chaka Fattah, Christopher S. Murphy, and Robert C. Scott; Elizabeth Smart, advocate and president of the Elizabeth Smart Foundation; Ernie Allen, President and CEO of the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children; Joe Torre, Major League Baseball legend and Chairman of the Board for the Joe Torre Safe at Home Foundation; and the Rev. Gregory Boyle, Homeboy Industries.

OJJDP supports states and communities in their efforts to develop and implement effective and coordinated prevention and intervention programs and to improve the juvenile justice system so it protects public safety, holds offenders accountable, and provides treatment and rehabilitative services for juveniles and families.  For more information on OJJDP, visit: www.ojjdp.gov.  

The conference agenda is available at: http://www.ojjdp.gov/2011conference/2011ConferenceProgram.pdf.

OJP, headed by Assistant Attorney General Laurie O. Robinson, provides federal leadership in developing the nation's capacity to prevent and control crime, administer justice, and assist victims. OJP has six components: the Bureau of Justice Assistance; the Bureau of Justice Statistics; the National Institute of Justice; the Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention; the Office for Victims of Crime; and the Office of Sex Offender Sentencing, Monitoring, Apprehending, Registering, and Tracking. More information about OJP can be found at www.ojp.gov.

SOURCE Department of Justice

If you have an opinion about this please contact your local representatives and make your voice known.  How can our government represent us (the citizens) if they don't know what our opinions are!  Get involved, Stay informed and Interact – It's not only our right as Americans but our responsibility as citizens and parents!

from: Kid Safe

Under a new European Union (EU) edict on toy safety, unsupervised children below the age of eight will no longer be permitted to blow up balloons due to choking hazards, according to Britain’s Daily Telegraph. Balloons and other toys — including magnetic fishing games, toy lipsticks, and recorders — have been added to the expanding catalog of Euro Zone regulations that are further empowering the region’s nanny state government.

The directive’s official guidance reads: "For latex balloons there must be a warning that children under eight years must be supervised and broken balloons should be discarded." Further, the EU’s legislation uplifts restrictions on the loudness of noisy toys, like rattles or musical instruments; likewise, all teddy bears marketed for children under three-years-old must be fully washable, as to prevent spreading of diseases and infections. Critics note that such regulatory authority means the popular "Lots O’ Hugging Bear" will be facing a ban if it does not undergo strict and costly new guidelines.

Despite their decades of entertainment, party toys such as small whistles and magnetic fishing games will be regulated, and possibly banned, because of small parts or dangerous chemicals that are allegedly hazardous to children’s health. Indeed, the popular "paper tongue" whistle blowers, commonly used at birthday parties, are now "unsafe" for all children under the age of 14, due to the possibility of a child swallowing and choking on pieces of the whistle.

An EU official insisted that the government’s safety experts know best, while an EU spokesman asserted that the "safety standards have been agreed by the UK together with the other EU member states in order to prevent every parent’s worst nightmare." Another official stated, "You might say that small children have been blowing up balloons for generations, but not anymore and they will be safer for it."

Frank Furedi, a sociology professor at the renowned University of Kent, signaled that toy safety bans are a burgeoning legislative trend to micro-manage children’s lives, while discounting their right to learn, explore, and develop both socially and independently. "Toys and activities, such as blowing up balloons, are part and parcel of the type of children’s play that helps them become independent and self-reliant," Furedi averred. "These bans diminish the experience, both of having fun and learning, by turning play into a danger zone with rules that stifle life and adventure for children."

Paul Nuttall, who retains a seat on the European Parliament’s consumer safety committee, called the EU’s authority a "kill joy" for children’s well-being. "I would say that this is crackers but [I’m] sure children are banned from using them too. EU party poopers should not be telling families how to blow up balloons," he contended.

But such regulatory power not only robs children of their freedoms, but also the parents of EU children. Must the government circumvent a parent’s authority in protecting their children, critics ask? Is preaching to parents about the dangers of eating marbles really necessary, or for that matter, judicially moral?

Although EU officials have noted that governmental authorities cannot regulate how products are used in the home, the mere act of regulating will manipulate what retail stores are able to supply, as certain products will be lifted from the market due to inflated supply and manufacturing costs. Although not a direct "ban," the aftereffects will surely lead to products being eliminated from the market.

For toy products that remain on the market, opponents suggest that the directive will undoubtedly hike consumer prices, due to new research and development needed to meet regulatory requirements. Suppliers have already warned that they will be increasing prices this Christmas to offset the costs of new tests mandated by the EU legislature. Clive Shelton, an expert on toy safety, asserted, "The new provisions for suppliers to keep detailed technical information about their products are proving to be very challenging" — not to mention, very costly.

from: Kid Safe

In her own words she describes what cyberbullying is all about.

 It's important for parents and kids to be aware of what cyberbullying is all about.  When it's not safe for kids, and what parents need to know to keep their kids safe

These days we spend more of our lives online than ever before and our kids are certainly no exception and Cyberbullying is a Big Problem!

Parents and caregivers hear more and more about the risks our kids are exposed to on the Internet and it's easy to feel overwhelmed by the flood of risks and tips.

One question we get over and over from parents is how to protect their family from cyberbullying. In this two-part series, we'll explain the lingo and give you some tools to arm your kids in cyber-land so you can protect them even when you're not with them.

There are so many terms that refer to online abuses; it can be hard to keep them straight. "Cyberbullying" is harassing or intimidating someone over the Internet through email, instant messaging, social networking sites (Facebook and MySpace) and cell phones. There are several types of cyberbullying:

Flaming and trolling: Sending or posting hostile messages intended to "inflame" the emotions of others.

Happy-slapping: Recording someone being harassed or bullied in a way that usually involves physical abuse, then posting the video online for public viewing.

Identity theft/impersonation: Stealing someone's password and/or hijacking their online accounts to send or post incriminating or humiliating pictures, videos or information.

Photoshopping: Doctoring digital images so that the main subject is placed in a compromising or embarrassing situation.

Physical threats: Sending messages that involve threats to a person's physical safety.

Rumor spreading: Spreading gossip through email, text or social networking sites.

Unfortunately, any time your child is online he or she can be targeted. From social networking sites to online gaming (both via the computer and through a console such as X-Box or PS3), to texting and chat rooms, our kids are spending more time exposed than ever before. However, it's not as scary as it sounds, I promise, particularly if your kids avoid riskier behaviors that can leave them more vulnerable. Recognizing the risks and communicating about how they can protect themselves is the first step to keeping them safe.

Cell phones: A recent study from the Pew Internet & American Life Project (www.pewinternet.org) shows that teens (ages 12-17) use text messaging to communicate with their friends more than email or instant messaging.

"Sexting" is a sexually explicit text or picture message sent by one person to another. According to Pew, only about 4 percent of the teens they surveyed say they have sent sexually suggestive nude or nearly nude images of themselves to someone via text message; however, 15 percent have received one, and older teens are more likely to be the recipient.

Online gaming: Online gaming allows your child to communicate with hundreds (sometimes thousands) of other people inside a giant chat room. The anonymity can provide children with some safeguards — if they don't tell anyone who they are then no one is likely to target them. However, they can leave themselves pretty exposed if they share too much personal information or get too emotionally invested in the game. These games often have a competitive aspect to them, from fighting with other players for in-game items to "killing" other players, sometimes extremely realistically. Bullies may feel empowered to be mean and can go to extreme lengths to follow another player around, mock them, repeatedly "kill" them or spam them with nasty messages.

Social networking, email and instant messaging: Children sometimes forget that what they share or post can be forwarded just as instantly as it was received, setting themselves up as a potential target if they share private information. Some kids intentionally post or share intimate details of their lives because they believe it will help them gain popularity. This can leave them a prime target for a cyberbully.

By keeping informed, using a kidsafe browser, allowing your kids to play educational games about internet safety, and keeping the dialog open between you and your child at all times; are all ways you can help protect your child from the dangers of the internet and hopefully prevent cyberbullying, either as a victim or as a criminal. Check out our report for kids about Cyberbullying

I know you are probably thinking why would we have Lady Gaga on Kidsafe.com?  Well, no matter what your thoughts are on her performances, or her music, or even her as a person,she does write a lot about believing in yourself and letting your "weirdness" be OK.  Kids have a lot of trouble with their identity in High School, just as she did, and that is where a lot of her music comes from is those akward years when you are trying to figure out who you are and who you want to be. 

Cyberbullying, bullying in general and hate crimes are horrible and have sent children to their death bed way too early.  This is not the first cyberbullying suicide we have reported on Kidsafe.com this year and unfortunately I don't think it will be the last suicide we discuss due to cyberbullies or any kind of bullying or abuse for that matter.

I think she has done a wonderful thing here to bring attention to the problems, issues and tragedies of cyberbullying and their victims.

Here is what she has to say about cyberbullying and high school tragedies.

 "We lost a Little Monster this week," Gaga said, displaying a video of Jamey. His "It Gets Better" video mentioned Gaga and her music several times as he discussed the things that helped him get through the school day.

Before he ended his life, Jamey wrote to Gaga. "@LadyGaga Bye, Mother Monster. Thank you for all you have done, paws up forever," he tweeted.

"I wrote this record about how your identity is really all you've got when you're in school," Gaga said. "So tonight, Jamey, I know you're up there looking at us, and you're not a victim. You're a lesson to all of us. I know it's a bit of a downer, but sometimes the right thing is more important than the music."

During the song, an emotional Gaga turned to the crowd and said, "Bullying is for losers." She's vowed to meet with the president to establish anti-bullying laws. "I will not stop fighting. This must end," she tweeted. "Our generation has the power to end it. Trend it #MakeALawForJamey."

Here is Lady Gaga's  performance at the IHeartRadio concert and her dedication to cyberbullying victim Jayme as well as her vow to help put an end to these horrible tragedies.

What is your experience with Teen Suicide and Cyberbullying?

Do you think we as a society can do more to prevent such tragedies? Did you read Rising Threat to Kids

By Bob Riha Jr., USA TODAY

Child-safety advocates say identity thieves and pedophiles are taking advantage of kids' infatuation with mobile devices and apps. The Federal Trade Commission last month announced a $50,000 settlement with app maker W3 Innovations for collecting and dispersing information of kids under 13 in violation of the Children's Online Privacy and Protection Act, or COPPA.

Earlier this year the FTC wrested a record $3 million settlement from online game developer Playdom, now a division of Disney, for similar COPPA violations. Child-safety advocates say identity thieves and pedophiles have begun taking advantage of youngsters' increasing infatuation with mobile devices and Web apps.

"Children are using these services more and more, opening themselves up to more information disclosures," says Andrew Serwin, chairman of the privacy practice at law firm Foley & Lardner. "And there's more and more mobile services directed to children, as well." W3 Innovations published Emily's Girl World, Emily's Dress Up and Emily's Runway High Fashion, online services which encouraged kids to create virtual models and outfits and e-mail a fictitious character named Emily with comments and blog posts.

Apple iPhone and iPad users downloaded Emily apps more than 50,000 times. "We want to make it crystal clear, to app developers and to others in this new mobile space, that we believe the protection under COPPA is not platform specific," says David Vladeck, director of the FTC's consumer protection bureau.

"If you can't do it online, you can't do it in an app."

FTC staff is hammering out revisions to COPPA rules likely to include different guidelines for verifying parental permission for kids to use certain apps, and specific rules to protect children using Internet-connected mobile devices, Serwin says.

Meanwhile, more children than ever are using mobile devices and spending longer hours socializing online and and using cool Web apps designed to gather data in support of selling advertising. A recent survey by anti-virus firm AVG found roughly half of children ages 6 through 9 regularly interact with friends online, yet 58% of their parents admitted to not being knowledgeable about social networks.

Rising commercial pressures for kids to get online add to already intense peer pressures, says Hanan Lavy, CEO of child security software maker United Parents. Facebook is open to those 13 or older, though a recent Consumer Reports survey found 7.5 million Facebook users 12 and under. And Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg has said he would like to formally extend Facebook to kids. "

The risks to children from social networking at an early age are numerous," Lavy says. "As pedophiles become more technologically sophisticated, they're able to find and connect with kids easier than with previous methods." More time spent online also means higher risk of children getting exposed to inappropriate content and advertising. Identity thieves target minors' names and Social Security numbers to create bogus credit accounts with a lower likelihood of getting discovered.

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Geddes (WSYR-TV) — A program intended to help find missing children may be in jeopardy. Many parents make a point of getting a child ID card, photos and fingerprints taken. They are then stored in a police database to help find missing children.

As with many things lately, money is the issue. The New York State Sheriff's Association puts more than 50,000 kids in the database across the state each year. By far, the biggest venue, where most parents sign up is the New York State Fair. After this year, we’re told federal funding is going to disappear.

Tracey Ike has brought her 7-year-old to the fair for three years running. Each time, Aidan updates his picture and fingerprints with Operation Safe Child.

"It is something that we always look for. I always want to have a record on me, just in case, God forbid, something should ever happen to him," explained Tracey.

That's music to the ears of the New York State Sheriff's Association, which serviced a record number of children here last year. They took over operations when budget cuts forced State Police to back out last year. Next year, a $50,000 grant they rely on, won't be renewed.

Mark Anderson with the NYS Sheriff's Association told NewsChannel 9, "We're convinced that somebody out there, some corporate sponsor, sees the value of this and is going to help us out. We don't know who that might be at this time, but we're going to look high and low and find somebody."

Working now with an outdated system and no new funding, Anderson is still dreaming about upgrades that would include cards for seniors with dementia and the mentally disabled…if he can get 75 new units at a cost of $5,000 apiece. For parents, the benefits are priceless.

One mom said, "There's definitely other things that could definitely be cut before this and yeah, I'd be disappointed. If it's something that could save my kid., then, it's something worth keeping."

"It's disconcerting actually, because it's really the only lace that we come into contact with somebody being able to fingerprint him and take his picture. So, a little bit sad about that, you know,” Tracey continued.

As of right now, there is no Federal funding for the next year, but Anderson is determined to return here somehow. If he gets the money for his upgrade, it would be in effect within two months, and seniors and the mentally disabled could get cards at the Fair next year. 

 

So what can you do?

• Keep a lock of hair for your child
• Take pictures often especially if their hair changes or as they get older and seem to change overnight
• Take mental notes of what you child is wearing when you take them to school or drop them off somewhere
• Know where your kids are playing, on-line and off-line
• Know your child's friends, their parents, and their phone numbers and even their online identitites
• Keep an open dialog with your kids about safety, who to call if there is trouble, how to protect themselves, to run from strangers and all the other stuff that all parents should be talking with their kids about on a daily basis. 

I know some of you are thinking – Why are you telling me this, I know all this stuff and I do all this stuff, I am a good parent?  We get busy in our lives, school schedules, soccer, cheerleading, football, homework, our jobs, our marriages, multiple children, cars, groceries, utility bills, etc.

This is just a reminder that it our own responsiblity to keep our kids safe.  Just because you registered your child in a database somewhere does not mean that they will be protected.  Those databases are for "after the child is missing" they are not Proactive in protecting your child.  

No parent wants to admit that their child could be a cruel and hurtful cyber-bully, but obviously if there are victims of cyber bullying then there must be perpetrators of the crime. I hope you find this article of great value and would love to see your comments and thoughts! 

"Children resort to cyberbullying for many of the same reasons they resort to any type of bullying — to gain power, to retaliate and to harm others," Logan said. "The 'cyberworld' may be seen as ideal due to the anonymity it provides and the ability to reach a larger audience."

If you discover your child is a cyberbully, calmly talk to him or her. Don't lecture. Don't talk at or down to the child, but have an honest and open conversation that focuses primarily on why the child turned to cyberbullying.

"The power of words and how they are used is taking a whole new turn with the advent of online and other digital communication between children today," said Weiner. "Helping children to take time to cool down and deal with their anger or frustration before they respond online is an important step."